15 questions to start your self-discovery journey

Two years ago, when I was at the lowest point in my life – I didn’t know where to begin cleaning up. I was such a rot – everything around me was falling apart. With a toddler and a new-born screaming at me for my attention, all I could hear was a buzz. The house was a mess, dishes always piling at the sink, wouldn’t know what to cook and I would just stuff myself with anything edible I could put my hands on.

It was like as if I was in the middle of a tornado – looking for calm.

In that moment of vulnerability suddenly it struck me – what have I become? I don’t remember when and how things had changed for the worse – I couldn’t even remember when I felt like myself last.

Trying to find where I lost myself, I started on a journey of self-discovery. Initially, I couldn’t even remember or decide what my favorite color, fruit, or ice cream flavor was. That was the most shattering phase of my life. It was the most difficult thing to do – to look inside and ask myself questions that I would ask someone I was meeting for the first time.

It was obvious that I was at the lowest of my physical and mental health. I needed to work on my well-being. But, at that time, all I could feel was emptiness and a constant sinking feeling.

For anyone who is facing a dip right now, I would suggest you slow down and take two steps back. Try and get to know WHO you are and WHAT is it that you desire. It’s like going on a date with yourself. Every experience you have, every conversation with someone, every song you hear or sight you see, every thought you think, has the ability to change something inside of you. So being in touch with yourself monthly or even quarterly would do – but it’s very important to stop and discover yourself time and again and to be aware and clear of where you are at now and where you are heading.

There are many benefits of self-discovery. Being self-aware not only helps you with confidence but also helps you with a purpose and direction to move ahead in life. It makes life more intentional so you understand what makes you happy and what doesn’t. It paves a path to love and celebrate who you are. Helps you understand the limitations and bad habits that are pulling you down. You tend to look at the past as experiences from which you derive lessons instead of them dictating the way you feel. Knowing yourself will help you enjoy the journey of life passionately and not find it burdensome.

Below are some of the questions you could ask yourself and be honest with your answers. What would you say if no one was watching you? Take a pen and a book and hit it off. If you haven’t been in the habit of journalling, this exercise may seem very heavy. You might not get the right words initially or you may even be blank. It could also be very triggering. But give yourself some time and be patient. It’s worth all the effort and extremely rewarding.

1. Do you believe in a higher being as the Creator, Sustainer, and Nourisher of the universe and everything in it? It’s important to have clear thoughts about Your creator and to understand the purpose of being created.
2. What would your dream day look like? If nothing was stopping you, no fear or limitations, how would you spend your day? From the moment you wake up till the time you sleep. Thinking of this in detail helps you be aware of how your day is now and how you could improve it. This could also help you with understanding your limiting patterns and also the emotions that you feel often – and if they are causing a hindrance in living your life to the fullest.
3. Do you have any long-term/short-term goals in mind? Having goals and purpose makes life more rewarding as we are constantly trying to work towards them and make things happen. If you feel stuck in life, this question could help with getting into a direction to move ahead.
4. What can you do today to start building your dream life? What are you willing to sacrifice to get there? Goals without actions are like daydreaming. You have to consistently take small action steps towards achieving those goals. Making progress, however small is the key to a fulfilling life. To look back and see how far you have come gives a sense of accomplishment.
5. Is there anything you are extremely passionate about? Something you consider a hobby that gives you immense calm and peace. Every human is born with a talent. There is something special about you that absolutely no one can do better than you. But showing up consistently and polishing those talents is what makes you shine over others. Dig deep into yourself to find what is it that gives you immense joy.
6. Are there any favorite things you love to do all by yourself? Solitude is the moment when our soul is free to talk to us. When you are away from the business of life, all by yourself, basking in your glory – you are at your best self. What is it that you love to do in those moments? Do you spend time with yourself?
7. Do you like doing any physical activity? How does it make you feel? To make time for yourself and prioritize your health speaks volumes about your priorities and it also shows how seriously you take yourself and hence, others should too.
8. How does making a mistake or failing at something make you feel? Have you learned any lessons from the mistakes you did in your past? It is the best way to understand how you talk to yourself. Are you kind or harsh? What are your expectations of yourself? Do you encourage for better next time or shun yourself?
9. What does success mean to you and how do you see yourself being successful? The meaning of success would be different for everyone but do you even see yourself there?
10. Hard/soft skills that you are proficient at? Your strengths. Being aware of your strengths and working on them speaks of your self-confidence.
11. Do you know your weaknesses and do you consider working on them? Understanding your weaknesses and trying to work around them also talks about your self-confidence. It takes a lot of courage to own them.
12. Do you face your emotions or ignore them? Do you understand how you are feeling in a difficult situation and why? Would you rather sleep, eat or scroll your emotions away or would you sit with them and give yourself time to process them?
13. Are you a self-aware person? Do you consider working towards improving yourself? Knowing what went wrong today and striving for a better tomorrow is the gist of self-improvement.
14. Who are your core people? Your support system? Humans are made to thrive in social groups. So, it’s an innate need to be validated, supported, and loved by other humans. Do you have a core group of people you are yourself with? Do they love and support you? Do you provide that love and support to anyone?
15. Do you make efforts to keep up with close family and friends? Whether you like it or not, your relationships are part of the mix that makes you who you are. Do you understand what relationships get the best out of you while the ones that are affecting you in a toxic way?